For the life of me
by laughing.loving.living
Summary: A story narrated by Naruto about his 2 best friends. The song We were only freshmen by vere pipe inspired this peice. Sasusaku, Naruhina...oneshot They would finally be together.


**I do not own Naruto OR We Were Only Freshmen by Verve Pipe.**

**This fanfiction is so much better if you listen to the song while reading. enjoy.**

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For The Life Of Me

Who would have thought, Sakura Haruno one of the toughest people I ever knew, hurt, scared, vulnerable, and pregnant? All because we thought we were invincible. God only knew we weren't.

_When I was young I knew everything  
and she a punk who rarely ever took advice  
now I'm guilt stricken, sobbing with my head on the floor  
stop a baby's breath and a shoe full of rice_

But that baby is now dead, aborted. Not by her choice of course, it wasn't even the father of the baby's choice. It was her own father. His reputation at risk he couldn't take that chance. Abortion was his only answer for her.

_I can't be held responsible  
cause she was touching her face  
I won't be held responsible  
she fell in love in the first place_

Can you blame him really though? His baby was only a freshman as was her boyfriend. Her boyfriend hurt her too. He said he didn't love her to protect himself. He was cold, so much like her own father. I blame him. I feel guilty but I won't take the blame again, but I couldn't save her this time. Only Sasuke, that bastard of my best friend, could.

_For the life of me I cannot remember  
what made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise  
for the life of me I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins  
we were merely freshmen_

We were only freshmen. None of this should have happened. Why did we think we were invincible? We're not… I wonder sometimes if Sasuke even feels bad for what he put her through. He always did say though "I won't be held responsible, she fell in love in the first place."

_My best friend took a week's vacation to forget her  
his girl took a week's worth of valium and slept  
now he's guilt stricken sobbing with his head on the floor  
thinks about her now and how he never really wept he says…_

I found my answer when I saw him crying today. After all these years of nothingness he was crying. He left for Hawaii while she downed valium never to wake up again. He called her a coward for going out like this. Sasuke Uchiha had spoke at her funeral, still no tears. But I guess he didn't cry in public. Now he's guilt stricken sobbing with his head on the floor, he thinks about her and how he never really wept and he said

_I can't be held responsible  
cause she was touching her face  
I won't be held responsible  
she fell in love in the first place_

But he was responsible, he knew and I did too. He couldn't sleep at night without telling himself this. I closed the door leaving him to cry out her name until I felt my own tears run down my face. I heard him scream "Sakura why? Why did you leave me here? God damn it, you coward; why did you do this to me?" He screamed it so loud I saw people around me wince. I left the apartment pulling on my sunglasses.

_We've tried to wash our hands of all of this  
we never talk of our lacking relationships  
and how we're guilt stricken sobbing with our heads on the floor _  
_we fell through the ice when we tried not to slip, we'd say…_

I bought flowers from Sakura's old best friend Ino. She smiled weakly handing me the 'forget me not's' and the cherry blossoms. Ha, funny forget me not's were always her favorite. Damn if she only knew she didn't need a flower to tell us what to do. We were all having trouble trying to forget her. I held the forget me nots and the cherry blossoms close to me. I would never forget that cherry blossom...I went back to his apartment. Sasuke was still on the floor holding something in his hands. It was a picture; the homecoming dance. I picked up my only best friend and dragged him to her grave. I placed the flowers next to her grave and I looked over at my best friend. He fell to his knees. "Naruto, I did it. I fell through the ice and now I'm freezing." I sent him a questioning look with tears running down my cheeks. "I wanna be with—can you...just kill me dobe? Send me with her and my baby?"

_I can't be held responsible  
cause she was touching her face  
I won't be held responsible  
she fell in love in the first place_

_3_

_For the life of me I cannot remember  
What made us think that we were wise and  
Wed never compromise  
For the life of me cannot believe  
Wed ever die for these sins  
We were merely freshman_

"Dammit Sasuke. You're all I got now. Don't talk shit like this. She wouldn't have wanted it." I looked up at the sky as if she was there supporting what i had just said. "We were only freshmen back then. We're different now…" He continued to cry. Sasuke Uchiha was crying like he had never cried before. Maybe the bastard was making up for lost time. "It wasn't your fault." I said lying through my teeth. I knew he could tell when he looked up at me.

"Stop fucking lying...you know she did it because I told her I didn't love her or the baby she was carrying. She's dead because of me!" Sasuke screamed at me. "Besides you have that Sai kid, Shikamaru, Kiba, Shino, Chouji, Neji, TenTen, Ino, and your fucking girlfriend Hinata. You have someone to love and live for. Mine's dead and gone because of me dammit!"

_We were merely fresh man._

"You can't be held responsible; she fell in love in the first place." I said using his own words. He buried his head in hands and took them off screaming into the air again. Tears splattered on the floor and i finally got a good look at him.

_I won't be held responsible _

"I LOVE YOU GOD FUCKING DAMMIT! I FUCKING LOVE YOU!" His shout became softer. "I fucking loved you…all because you loved me first." He slammed his fist on the ground and then brought that hand to the head stone. His fingers skimmed the letter's he picked out _Sakura Haruno, loving daughter, true best friend and someone who deserved better._"Leave Naruto. I want to so say goodbye." I got up and patted him on the back. Somehow when I got home I wasn't surprised when I had a call on my voicemail saying that Sasuke Uchiha was found dead at Sakura Haruno's grave. He wrote I love you in the dirt next to her grave and died from the pocket knife that Sakura had given him for his birthday two years before she died. The coward stabbed it through his heart. That bastard left me alone and now my two best friends would rest in hell for their sin, the one of suicide.

_For the life of me I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins_

I would have done the same. Cocked the gun and blew off my head if I didn't have Hinata and a son coming into this world. I would stop this cycle. My friends cried after hearing Sasuke died. I spoke at his funeral and picked out the words on his head stone. _Sasuke Uchiha, caring friend, a best one to few, a lover to one._ I love you guys, you selfish horrible people. I'll see you soon. I hope you finally can live in the happiness you always wanted while I try to make something out of my hell instead of running. I love you.

_She fell in love in the first place_

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**I hope you liked it. Reveiw please.**

**haha i hope you know i bawled like a baby when i wrote this. if you have a soul you would have cryed a little!**


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